Common Questions on Children in Divorce

When facing divorce, one of the most pressing concerns for parents is the impact on their children. As the senior partner at Alexander JLO, I have frequently encountered questions regarding child arrangements during and after divorce. Here, I address some of the most common inquiries and offer guidance for parents navigating this challenging time.

1. What will happen to the children during the divorce?

During the divorce process, the welfare of the children is paramount to the Courts and should be to you. Parents are encouraged to work together to create a parenting plan that reflects the child’s best interests, outlining living arrangements and contact schedules. It’s essential to communicate openly with your children, reassuring them that both parents will continue to be involved in their lives.

2. How is custody determined?

In England and Wales, the term “custody” has been replaced by “child arrangements.” These arrangements encompass where the child will live (residence) and how often they will see the other parent (contact). The court will prioritise the child’s best interests and consider their wishes and feelings, especially if they are older.

3. Can I relocate with my children after divorce?

If a parent wishes to move away with the children, they must obtain consent from the other parent or a court order. The court will adopt a holistic approach and will consider all the circumstances of a particular case, including for example the reasons for the move, the impact on the child’s relationship with both parents, and the child’s best interests.

4. How can I ensure a fair arrangement for contact?

Creating a fair contact arrangement often involves negotiation and compromise. It’s important for both parents to be flexible and communicate openly. If disputes arise, mediation can help facilitate discussions. Having a solid parenting plan can also provide clarity on schedules and responsibilities.

5. What should I do if my ex-partner is not following the court order?

If one parent is not complying with the court order regarding child arrangements, it’s important to document the instances of non-compliance. Seeking legal advice may be necessary, and you may choose to consider enforcement options through the court to uphold the arrangement.

6. How can I support my children emotionally during the divorce?

Emotional support is crucial. Encourage your children to express their feelings and ensure they know it’s normal to feel upset or confused. Maintaining routines can also help provide stability. Consider professional counselling or medical help for your children if they are struggling to cope.

7. What should I do if my child expresses a preference for living with one parent?

As children grow older, they may express preferences about where they want to live. While their views should be respected, the court will consider multiple factors, including the child’s age, maturity and overall welfare when making decisions.

8. How can I handle conflict effectively with my ex-partner?

Effective communication is key to managing conflict. Focus on discussing issues related to the children and try to keep emotions in check. Consider employing mediation services to assist in resolving disagreements amicably.

Conclusion

Divorce can profoundly affect children, but prioritising their well-being can help mitigate the impact. Open communication, cooperation and a focus on the child’s best interests are essential. If you have further inquiries or need assistance with child arrangements, the team at Alexander JLO is here to help guide you through this challenging process.

This blog was prepared by Alexander JLO’s senior partner, Peter Johnson on the 23rd February 2025and is correct at the time of publication. With decades of experience in almost all areas of law Peter is happy to assist with any legal issue that you have. He is widely regarded as one of the capital’s leading divorce lawyers. His profile on the independent Review Solicitor website can be found Here