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Introduction
Being unable to find your spouse when you need to start divorce proceedings adds stress to an already difficult situation. The law in England and Wales recognises this problem and provides routes to obtain a divorce when a spouse is missing. This guide explains the legal framework, what you must prove, how to serve documents, alternative methods the court accepts, and practical steps to locate a missing spouse. It also covers timing costs and common pitfalls so you can act confidently and avoid procedural delays.
Overview of the legal position
You can apply for a divorce in England and Wales even if your spouse cannot be found. The Divorce, Dissolution and Separation Act 2020 introduced a no-fault ground for divorce which simplified the basis for making an application. However the court still requires either that you serve the divorce papers on your spouse or that you can show you have taken all reasonable steps to locate them and that service is impracticable.
The court applies two separate legal tests: jurisdiction and service. You must satisfy the court that it has jurisdiction to hear your case, and you must follow the correct procedure to notify your spouse or to persuade the court that you could not do so.
Do you meet the court’s jurisdictional tests?
Before considering service the court must be sure it can hear your case. You must show you meet one of the jurisdictional connections with England and Wales. The most common are:
– you are habitually resident in England or Wales
– you are domiciled in England or Wales
– you have lived in England or Wales for at least 12 months immediately before starting proceedings
Check which basis applies to you because the evidence you provide will differ depending on the ground you rely on. If you have lived abroad recently or you and your spouse separated overseas the court will examine your residency with care.
Start by checking practical documents that show habitual residence or domicile: council tax bills, utility bills, payslips, tenancy agreements, and HMRC records. Collecting this evidence early prevents delays.
Initial steps before you apply for divorce
Before you issue an application you should take reasonable steps to find your spouse. The law does not ask for exhaustive efforts but it expects sensible searches that a person in your position would make. Practical searches include:
– contacting relatives and close friends who may know their whereabouts
– checking the electoral register and the Property Alert services
– contacting their employer or professional bodies
– visiting their last known address and speaking to neighbours
– searching social media accounts and professional networking sites
– checking with GP surgeries or other organisations they used if appropriate
– checking passports and travel records if you suspect they have travelled abroad
Keep a detailed contemporaneous record of every step you take. Save copies of emails, screenshots of social media, notes of phone calls with dates and names, and letters you send. The court will want to see this evidence when you apply for alternative service or for substituted service.
How to start a divorce when you cannot find your spouse
There are two routes to proceed if you cannot locate your spouse: apply for substituted service or ask the court for an order dispensing with service. You must normally attempt standard personal service first but if that proves impossible the court will consider alternatives.
1. Personal service where possible
If you know an address where your spouse might receive documents you should attempt personal service. You or your legal representative can arrange to hand the divorce papers to the spouse in person at their residence or workplace. In practice solicitors or process servers usually carry out service to ensure the court accepts it occurred.
If your spouse refuses to accept the documents a process server can complete an affidavit or statement confirming the refusal and describing the circumstances. The court may accept service if the server can show the papers were left at the spouse’s usual residence or workplace in a manner that ensured they could receive them.
2. Substituted service
If you cannot achieve personal service the court may allow substituted service. Substituted service permits delivering the documents by alternative means which the court considers likely to bring the proceedings to your spouse’s attention.
Common substituted service methods include:
– posting the papers at a last known address and leaving them with someone of suitable age who lives there
– sending the papers by recorded delivery to a last known address
– email to a known working email address
– service via social media in limited circumstances where it is the spouse’s main form of contact
You must apply to the court for permission to use substituted service and explain why personal service is impracticable. Provide the evidence of your search steps and suggest a method the court should approve. The court will decide which method best fits the circumstances and is likely to inform the spouse.
3. Service out of the jurisdiction
If you discover your spouse is abroad you may need to serve them outside England and Wales. Serving out of the jurisdiction follows specific rules which depend on the country involved, whether the country is a Hague Convention signatory and any applicable bilateral treaties.
Sending documents by international courier or using diplomatic channels might not suffice without a court order. Where the foreign country has specific procedures the court will require you to follow them. You should seek legal advice because incorrect service abroad can result in the court refusing to recognise the proceedings.
4. Dispensing with service: applying for an order and making substituted service yourself
If you can’t find any address to serve the papers the court can dispense with direct service after you show that you have taken all reasonable steps to locate the spouse. You must file an application supported by a sworn statement or affidavit that details your search efforts.
The court can then permit alternative steps such as:
– placing notice in a national newspaper
– publishing notice on a government website or the court website
– serving notice on an agent or next of kin if you can identify them
The court will only grant such relief after reviewing the evidence and considering whether the proposed method has a realistic chance of notifying the spouse. Courts balance the applicant’s right to a divorce against the respondent’s right to be informed.
What evidence convinces the court you tried to find your spouse?
The court expects clear documentation of your search. Useful evidence includes:
– copies of emails, messages and letters sent to the spouse and to relatives, friends employers or professionals
– screenshots of social media profiles or messages showing inactivity or changes
– printouts or certificates from electoral roll searches
– statements from neighbours or process servers who visited last known addresses
– records from organisations you contacted such as banks employment offices or tenancy agents
– travel and immigration checks where relevant
Organise this evidence into a chronology and attach it to your application. A well-presented bundle reduces the need for hearings and speeds up the court’s decision.
Applying for the divorce without the spouse’s participation
If the court permits substituted service or accepts your evidence that you cannot locate the spouse you can proceed with the divorce as an undefended application. After service the respondent has 14 days to acknowledge service if served within England and Wales or 28 days if served abroad. If they do not respond you can apply for a conditional order and then a final order to complete the divorce.
The typical steps are:
– issue the divorce application at court
– serve the spouse or obtain substituted service
– apply for the conditional order (previously called decree nisi)
– apply for the final order (previously called decree absolute) after the statutory waiting period
If the spouse appears later they can contest financial arrangements or child arrangements but they cannot normally stop the divorce itself once the court grants the final order, except in rare cases where fraud or procedural defects exist.
Protecting financial and child interests when the spouse is missing
Proceeding without the spouse can create risks to your financial and child arrangements. The court will not finalise financial claims automatically because you must resolve financial matters separately. You should consider starting financial remedy proceedings alongside the divorce if you cannot agree matters with the missing spouse.
Practical steps to protect your interests include:
– obtaining a freezing injunction if you suspect the spouse will dissipate assets
– applying for an occupation order if the family home is at risk
– seeking directions for disclosure of financial information from third parties such as banks
– applying for child arrangements orders or emergency protection orders if children might be at risk
You must explain to the court that the spouse’s absence prevents ordinary disclosure and request appropriate case management orders. Courts expect applicants to be proactive in preserving assets and protecting children.
Costs and timescales: what to expect
A divorce without a found spouse may take longer than an ordinary undefended divorce because the court will scrutinise the evidence of attempts to locate the spouse. Expect additional hearings and possible delays if the court requests further proof.
Costs vary widely. If you use a solicitor expect fees for advice preparing an application and preparing evidence for substituted service or dispensation orders. Using process servers or undertaking international searches also increases costs. If you are on a low income you may qualify for legal aid for some aspects including certain protective applications or you may apply for court fee remission.
Common pitfalls to avoid
Avoid straightforward mistakes that cause unnecessary delay:
– do not rely on informal verbal searches without documentation
– do not assume the court accepts social media screenshots without corroborating evidence
– do not send original documents by post without keeping copies
– do not start financial remedy proceedings without checking jurisdictional rules if the spouse is abroad
– do not ignore the need to protect assets or children while waiting for service or substituted service orders
Consider obtaining specialist family law advice early. Solicitors experienced in missing spouse cases can prepare stronger evidence bundles and suggest the most persuasive substituted service methods.
What if the spouse reappears after the divorce?
If your spouse appears after you obtain a divorce they may apply to set aside the divorce in rare circumstances such as fraud or lack of jurisdiction. They cannot normally undo orders that the court made following proper procedure unless they can show a clear procedural irregularity.
If the spouse challenges financial settlements the court will consider whether it can grant relief under family law rules depending on timing and the grounds advanced. The court usually prefers finality but it will balance fairness and the public interest in resolving disputes.
Using alternative dispute resolution when the spouse reappears
If the spouse resurfaces and challenges financial or child arrangements consider mediation or negotiation before returning to court. ADR often resolves issues quicker and at a lower cost than contested hearings. If mediation fails the court will allocate a timetable to resolve outstanding matters.
Practical checklist: steps to take if you cannot find your spouse
– Gather proof of habitual residence or domicile to establish jurisdiction
– Make and document reasonable searches including contacting family friends employers and neighbours
– Use process servers for personal service where you have an address
– Prepare an application for substituted service if personal service fails
– Consider service out of jurisdiction if you suspect the spouse is abroad
– Apply for dispensation from service only after demonstrating exhaustive reasonable steps
– Protect assets and children with emergency applications if necessary
– Keep copies of all correspondence and prepare a clear chronology for the court
– Seek specialist family law advice to reduce the risk of procedural defects
Conclusion
You can obtain a divorce in England and Wales even when you cannot find your spouse but you must follow the rules carefully. Courts expect applicants to make reasonable efforts to locate the missing spouse and to present clear documented evidence of those efforts. When personal service proves impossible the court can permit substituted service or dispense with service entirely, but it only does so after scrutinising the steps you took. Take active steps to protect financial and child interests while proceedings continue and obtain specialist legal advice to make your application robust.
If you need help preparing evidence or applying for substituted service or dispensation orders contact us as specialists in family law. We can advise on the best method to serve the papers and on measures to protect your assets and children while the case proceeds.
At Alexander JLO we have many years of experience of dealing with all aspects of family law and will be happy to discuss your case in a free no obligation consultation. Why not call us on +44 (0)20 7537 7000, email us at info@london-law.co.uk or get in touch via the contact us button and see what we can do for you?
This blog was prepared by Peter Johnson on 17th November 2025 and is correct at the time of going to press. With over forty years of experience in almost all areas of law Peter is happy to assist with any legal issue that you have. He is widely regarded as one of London’s leading divorce lawyers. His profile on the independent Review Solicitor website can be found Here.
To follow up on any of the above please contact Guy Wilton of our family department. Guy has wide experience of acting for the firm’s clients, their family and their businesses. Guy’s experience as a lawyer started in the Northern and Welsh Circuits, including the Liverpool Courts, where he represented numerous clients after being called to the Bar, before opting to join Alexander JLO in 2017 and qualifying as a solicitor in 2024. He is a highly experienced family lawyer with a particular interest in financial remedy proceedings and child contact disputes.
Guy’s profile on the independent Review Solicitor website can be viewed here.